#498 Up +28/-31 Down June 19 2012 at 12:00:00 am EDT
Drifty: it is so unreasonably cold here
Hatkirby: “WOW!” writes LeeAnne, “what a difference they have made in my life. No longer do I quake with fear at the slightest stressor. I am able to stride forward in my life with confidence…the kind of confidence that only a set of hairless, tumor-riddled testicles can give you.”
Drifty: what
Hatkirby: *lols*
Hatkirby: I'm reading an article about funny Amazon reviews
Hatkirby: apparently someone wrote that as a review for some male testicular cancer model or something like that
Drifty: who sells those things
Drifty: http://www.amazon.com/Male-Testicular-Exam-Model-Anatomy/dp/B0006TYJV6/ref=cm_rdp_product
Drifty: oh great god
Hatkirby: "Is this something that happen"
Hatkirby: oh god picture
Drifty: Look at the reviews!
Drifty: "it acts as a makeshift stress ball!"
Drifty: in the grocery store
Hatkirby: "It's a Bag Fulla Fun!"
Hatkirby: oh god at the grocery store
Drifty: "What is that you have ma am?"
Hatkirby: "IMMA LITTLE STRESSED—LET'S PULL OUT THOSE BALLS!"
Drifty: "A testicle teaching model with tumours!"
Drifty: "It's my personal teddy bear"
Hatkirby: "What is that you have, ma'am?" "They're my testicles!"
Drifty: "wtf go away this grocery is for sane people"
Drifty: Yes!
Drifty: oh god
Drifty: "Finally, a rubber scrotum that I can use for exam training purposes. My room mate was going "nuts" (pardon the pun) because I kept trying to use his. I wish he wasn't such a light sleeper. Oh well. "
Hatkirby: "A must have for the avid teabagger!"
Hatkirby: oh god lol: "I'm trying them out for TSA, too!"
Drifty: oh god
Drifty: lololol
Hatkirby: "I'm a chick, but I purchased a pair of these for my next trip. When I refuse the cancer-causing body scanner I just know they'll want to frisk me, so I figured I'd give them something extra to grab. Oh I can't wait to see the look on the face of 67-IQ agent when she snatches onto to these babies!"
Hatkirby: This is hilarious
Drifty: I bet half of these are trolls
Hatkirby: how can this be something that is sold
Drifty: but oh god these are hilarious
Drifty: what is this i don't even
Hatkirby: omg lolpun: "It goes without saying that my male exam model has come in handy for so many things, but when a friend of mine told me about how he used his as a pouch for his teabags, my world was officially rocked. There's nothing like doing your own teabagging at home, especially side-by-side with a fellow enthusiast. The model makes for perfect teabags -- ample, hefty and oh the aroma! There's nothing like the slap, slap, slappy sound I make as I dip my exam model teabags -- It's my cup of tea!"
Drifty: "Who doesn't love playing with scrotum? I know I do!"
Hatkirby: "Now I can take a break from squeezing my own scrotum constantly and give the little bugger a breather."
Hatkirby: dear god they're $147.44
Hatkirby: For a pair of TESTICLES with TUMORS?
Drifty: I would think there are better models out there without the tumours
Drifty: but still O.O
Hatkirby: omg wtf are we talking about
Drifty: WHAT
Drifty: "Was excited to get mine in the mail. Unfortunately a mistake was made and I received the female version instead. Needless to say, I was shocked and uncomfortable. "
Hatkirby: lololol one of the tags is "scientology"
Hatkirby: LOLWHAT female version?
Drifty: what
Hatkirby: It's also tagged "uranium ore"
Hatkirby: This is totally scientology!
Drifty: "I will keep it in my purse for emergencies"
Hatkirby: "badger sun screen spf 30"
Drifty: what emergencies
Drifty: what
Hatkirby: Testicular emergencies!
Hatkirby: "OH NO! FIRE! BREAK OUT THE TESTIES!"
Hatkirby: *throws balls at fire*
Drifty: "I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT I NEED! BALLS!"
Hatkirby: "THAT JUST EXACERBATED THE PROBLEM!"
Drifty: "NOW THE FIRES ARE HUNGRY!"
Hatkirby: O_o one of the tags is "pacifier"
Drifty: O_O_O_O_O_OO
Hatkirby: SCARRED BABBY
Hatkirby: lolol another tag is "dog treat"
Hatkirby: "Here boy, want some balls?"
Hatkirby: "RES REESE!"
Drifty: oh god
Drifty: a tag is 'male ego' lololol
Drifty: wait
Drifty: inafant developement?!
Drifty: mini squirrel underpants?!
Hatkirby: "harry potter"!??!!?!?!?
Drifty: "fresh whole rabbit"?!!
Drifty: I need to sit down... but I'm already sitting down!
Hatkirby: "fashion accessory"
Hatkirby: "I just got my new nuts! How fashionable!"
Hatkirby: "I'M PARIS HILTON AND I HAVE NUTS. BUY NOW!"
Drifty: oh dear
Drifty: Oh god, "uranium ore" - it emits radiation RUUUN
Hatkirby: RADIOACTIVE TESTICLES
Hatkirby: "scientology" ftw
Drifty: YES, CLEARLY A THING I NEED IN MY LIFe
Drifty: o dont you know
Hatkirby: "My new testicles tried to convert me to scientology!"
Drifty: They worship testicles!
Hatkirby: "OH GREAT TESTICLES, SHOW US HOW TO SUCK MORE IN OUR EVERY DAY LIVES"
Drifty: lololololoololololooolol
Hatkirby: this was a hilarious find
Drifty: the cat is looking at me funny
Hatkirby: He knows you're looking at balls!
Drifty: one of the treasures of the internet
Drifty: he likes balls
Drifty: he doesn't have any of his own
Hatkirby: Awww, poor Pumpkin
Drifty: :P
Drifty: in both ways
Hatkirby: "WUZZAT? BALLS? MEOWMEOWMEOW?"
Drifty: He sat on me earlier
Hatkirby: oh god nyan.cat with balls: "BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS BALLS"
Drifty: I just lay down and was just about to get up when "MEOW"
Drifty: oh god
Drifty: DOUBLE TESTICLES ALL THE WAY
Hatkirby: popped in there somehow
Drifty: why are we talking about this