azhdrake: Fucking love rereading my shit gasmasque: Why isn’t this fucker writing? azhdrake: I'm really funny actually hatkirby: You are hatkirby: And I think that… and I don’t even live in your head! gasmasque: I don’t think I’ve read any of your fics, Bees azhdrake: Haunted and Hunted is my favorite of them, if you want to. No pressure if you don't azhdrake: It's also kinda long and there's some continuity errors hatkirby: Bees wrote a 60k ish fic that had a single line in it about alcor writing a motorcycle and I found it so funny that I wrote a fic about it hatkirby: It’s SO good hatkirby: H and H all say hatkirby: Say hatkirby: I hate my phone hatkirby: I hate typing gasmasque: Please sir, may I have a link? hatkirby: I am stacking I am screaming I am pulling out the Dick NO!!!’ hatkirby: I PRESSED ENTER ANY WAY SO YOU CAN SEE WHAT I HAVE TO DEAL WITH hatkirby: hi gasmasque: Star, you’re my favorite comedian azhdrake: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8718655/chapters/19989166 hatkirby: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8718655 azhdrake: Hah beat Star to it by a whole five seconds gasmasque: Impressive azhdrake: Did I google my own fic, fail to find it, and have to fuck through my email because I'm not logged onto AO3 on this computer? Maybe hatkirby: Sorry for my tardiness I’m sitting here malding at my phone for wait Wtf it is fine with the word MALDING but I can’t type gun without it autocorrecting to Dick azhdrake: oijgo;aefja;owfjaw hatkirby: Throwing my phone out the window
hatkirby: Well we’re doing kinnie karaoke on Halloween and you should teleport in for that! pallasvoid: :wheeze: pallasvoid: god I wish I could teleport in for that pallasvoid: but also I have a very beefy cold rn this bitch is so nutty tweaked hatkirby: Oh no azhdrake: Hmmm azhdrake: Ball.cure hatkirby: cum.hospital azhdrake: Just the one ball. Multiple balls.cure would be dangerous hatkirby: True hatkirby: There’s a reason they say “take one of these and call me in the morning” hatkirby: Why aren’t y’all’s calling me out. That’s not even the expression. It’s “take two of these” azhdrake: Doesn't it. Doesn't it depend on what the meds dosage is??? hatkirby: The canned expression tho hatkirby: Is take two pallasvoid: sorry I was work azhdrake: I didn't know there was one of those hatkirby: Void call me out hatkirby: I’m being evil azhdrake: I mean I can id you want hatkirby: Pls pallasvoid: .... I haven't heard that as a canned phrase pallasvoid: but I am familiar with "try this and come back in six weeks" pallasvoid: from personal experince azhdrake: :alcor_has_gun: hatkirby: “Take two of these and call me in the morning” [hand you a pack of jawbreakers. Camera zooms out and you are at the only dentist in hell] azhdrake: Hell yeah I love jaw breakers! azhdrake: *skips into hell proper* hatkirby: Sorry did I forget to mention that they’re suppository jawbreakers azhdrake: Sorry I can't hear you I've already left and am eating this candy hatkirby: >:((((( azhdrake: :)))))) hatkirby: Ok I knew there was something wrong with this plan
hatkirby: yalls think this is gluten free hatkirby: [picture of Cream of Wheat] tinylittlegremlin: i- i dont believe so, star :blobnervous: tinylittlegremlin: why is it 60 dollars hatkirby: It's like 24 of them tinylittlegremlin: :NervousSmile: hatkirby: I bought these when I had my wisdom teeth surgery! tinylittlegremlin: i... see hatkirby: i was just eating smooth silky sugary farina all day every day hatkirby: and jello! tinylittlegremlin: but also gluten is, according to google, a wheat protein so no theyre probs not hatkirby: no yes lol i was joking tinylittlegremlin: y...um? hatkirby: it is absolutely full of gluten tinylittlegremlin: ok phew i thought so but i didnt wanna be an asshole if u werent tinylittlegremlin: just to the brim hatkirby: if i didn't know that after being gluten free for like two months i'd be worried tinylittlegremlin: Nothing But Gluten hatkirby: imagine i'm being gluten free and someone sees me eating a starbucks breakfast sandwich and they're like isn't that wheat bread and i'm like yeah. gluten free wheat bread tinylittlegremlin: XD hatkirby: no actually imagine it, do you think that would work 🥺 hatkirby: i want to go to starbucks tomorrow tinylittlegremlin: nooo probably not 😔 hatkirby: :blobsob:
hatkirby: https://beppo.online/@baka/110423339758447866 hatkirby: Happy D-ne Tuesday! ickyickyicky: SHDJFJFHHGI ickyickyicky: D-me Tuesday! Remember to be a lesbian and kiss women! hatkirby: I'll go do that!! ickyickyicky: Unfortunately I’m bisexual and bigender 😔 ickyickyicky: So like half way there hatkirby: I dunno what tf I am but I'm probably not a lesbian. I can play one on Tuesdays tho ickyickyicky: True!!! ickyickyicky: Tuesdays I’m a woman and lesbian ickyickyicky: I DID kiss my wife hatkirby: 👌 ickyickyicky: So ya know succeeding so far hatkirby: Pogging, even hatkirby: I have not kissed a girl yet today (or at all for uhh six years) ickyickyicky: “B-ko Chan your so poggers!” ickyickyicky: You have to give yourself a kiss! hatkirby: B-ko-chan that 360 no scope kiss was so cool 🥰 ickyickyicky: agshdhdjgfhfjfhv hatkirby: True if I'm being a girl today I can kiss the mirror like marina "teen idle" diamandis herself
hatkirby: did you know that the dog is supposed to be the dog owned by the dev team during the game's development? he had a name... i'm trying to remember hatkirby: oswin hatkirby: https://i.imgur.com/ZFSSHQy.jpeg hatkirby: http://the-witness.net/news/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/IMG_1808.jpg azhdrake: Oh that's really cute hatkirby: weird seeing that second photo because johnny suck's piss bottle isn't there azhdrake: what hatkirby: Yeah I said words azhdrake: You sure did hatkirby: i walked to the secret ending to take this screenshot hatkirby: https://storage.googleapis.com/beppo.online/media_attachments/files/111/297/764/257/444/827/original/2218a8fe4b7ca4ae.png hatkirby: the piss jar azhdrake: I see I see hatkirby: it doesn't actually seem to be there in the wide shot... so i was wrong about that hatkirby: anyway he's strapped in to a VR thing and presumably has a catheter in or something hatkirby: oswin also not there in the secret ending hatkirby: HELP https://www.pcgamer.com/you-decide-is-this-bottle-of-jonathan-blows-pee-real/ hatkirby: THIS IS LIKE FIVE DAYS BEFORE THE GAME CAME OUT hatkirby: he tweeted a picture of the catheter pee bottle BEFORE the game came out hatkirby: this is insane hatkirby: did they only film the secret ending video like a week before the game came out????
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hatkirby: this is from like, five days before the game came out https://www.pcgamer.com/you-decide-is-this-bottle-of-jonathan-blows-pee-real/ hatkirby: did they only film the EEE video like a week before release rever: What XD evandar_: that's in EEE's video? hatkirby: Yeah evandar_: damn evandar_: so yeah it looks like they did it last minute xD hatkirby: yalls didnt know about jonny blow's piss jar? evandar_: no hatkirby: XD hatkirby: yeah you can see it when he gets off the couch rever: In the set of all sentences this is not one I expected to hear today
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hatkirby: ok so i'm talking to a couple of other witness nerds and they didn't even know about the piss jar. smh azhdrake: Shaking my god damn head azhdrake: For fucking shame
toothpastecanyon: My friends!!! toothpastecanyon: You’ll never guess what I am azhdrake: FRUNCH toothpastecanyon: im not French!!!!!! toothpastecanyon: Je ne suis pas français!!!! azhdrake: Lunee? toothpastecanyon: What does that mean 👀 hatkirby: i gotta be honest i dont know WHAT the heck yalls are talking about !!!!!! toothpastecanyon: Star are you missing that je ne sais quoi? hatkirby: yeah i'm all fucked up hatkirby: 🖕 toothpastecanyon: You’re absolutely demonic hatkirby: tell me something i don't know
Lingo#8106: :xx: Lingo#8106: :wt: b??h viole? Lingo#8106: :xx: Lingo#8106: (4 6) undalevein: both violet hatkirby: bruh violet undalevein: :09_purple_moment: hatkirby: me when violet adds something crazy to AP witness undalevein: in high school, I learned AP witness hatkirby: ukhdsfkjsdhfkjsdhf hatkirby: laughed out loud for real